Doctor One Liners

  • A patient told the doctor about his loss of memory, the doc made him pay in advance.
  • Whenever my employment application asks who is to be notified in case of emergency, I always used to write, ‘A very good doctor’.
  • Making your therapist cry is reverse psychology.
  • I think when I was born, the doctor said to my father “I’m sorry. We did everything we could. But he pulled through.”
  • A doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. He was indeed right—I feel 10 years older already.
  • ‘I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.’ the patient asked. ‘Try to take off the candles next time.’ the doc replied.
  • By saying “I was afraid of the dentist”, I meant the bill.
  • I think a-pair-a-docs is two doctors on call at all times.
  • What would a dentist say to a Sabretooth tiger? You have outstanding teeth.
  • A lady gets a divorce after her doctor told her that she could no longer touch anything alcoholic.
  • I started lying to my wife because my doctor told to break a sweat once a day.
  • What does it mean if the doctor’s office is full of portraits by Picasso? Never agree to plastic surgery.

Hilarious Halloween one liners

Ghost Joke one liners

Who writes book about Halloween? A ghostwriter.

According to you which ghost is the best dancer? Me: The Boogie Man!

Cobwebs are piece of decoration in my house today! All thanks to Halloween.

What’s a monsters favorite desert? I-Scream!

How do Rednecks celebrate Halloween? Pump kin.

What do you call a dancing ghost? Polka-haunt-us.

What do you call a hot dog with nothing inside it? A “hollow-weenie!”

Hope you like these Halloween jokes mentioned above. So which one of these you are going to use?

Christmas One-liners

Did you know that Santa’s not allowed to go down chimneys this year? It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.

There’re 2 snowmen in a field, one snowman turned to the other and said “I don’t know about you but I can smell carrots.”!

Did you like the above Christmas humor? If you want to share other Christmas jokes with us, please comment below and let us laugh together.

Kids one Liners

These funny one liners will help in developing the sense of humor in your child and that’s the best to do it.

“The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.”

What do you name a fake noodle? An impasta.

The movie ‘Guardians of the galaxy’ was inspired from? The security guards of Samsung store.

What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.

What did one pencil tell to other pencil? You are sharp.

A pampered cow gives you what? Spoiled milk.

What did a sick banana tell the doctor? I’am not peeling well.

I understand that children these days aren’t easy to please, but your kids will love this set of knock knock question answers.

My fingers are crossed. I just hope you liked the above humor. Just try them on your kids if you are married. If not, go and find a life partner, have cute kids, tell them these jokes and let me know their reactions. Wait! why screw your life by getting married. Stay single and try these on children of your friends or neighbors. Stay happy, stay single.

This would be fun. Let the fun rolling and share with all of us which joke you tried on your kid (or other’s kids). Hope you enjoyed these lines as much as I did while writing them! See you in the next post. Bbye!